Some of you know this (but for obvious reasons I couldn't post this to the general public until now...) but this July my husband turned 40, and I decided I wanted to throw him a big surprise party. I actually started planning things back in February, with a general outline of who might be invited, where it might be held, and how I might pull it all off. Seems like a long time to be planning, I know... I probably spent less time planning my own wedding than I did this party... but anyone who knows D should know how incredibly difficult it is to surprise him... both because he is so intuitive, and also because he's so damned spontaneous.
So I started planning way in advance. I planned... who would be invited (close friends and family) where it would be held (my house) where we'd get the food (D's favorite restaurant caters, yay!) how many people would be visiting from out of town (at least one, possibly five), where potential out of towners would sleep, timeline for yard work (spread out over the course of 6 weeks so that it wouldn't look like I was suddenly preparing the house for a party) timeline for house work (spread out over 8 weeks for the same reason), how much I could set up guest sleeping quarters without making it look like I was setting up guest sleeping quarters, duration of distraction (min. three hours, 5 would be great), timing of laundry (so he could have his pick of what he wanted to wear once he realized there was a party going on) guest parking locations (neighbors offered their hidden driveway) and party rental supply delivery location (neighbors across the street offered to help so that D wouldn't see the extra tables and dishes) We had our anniversary dinner at the restaurant because they changed their menu for the summer, and I wanted to see which dishes D was most interested in. I'd sit for long periods of time, staring out the kitchen window trying to Tetris-out where everything would go for the party, but unable to move anything ahead of time to see where things might fit. I paid attention to the music D played when we drove places, made notes of the songs, and created a playlist on my iPod based on what seemed to be his favorites. I took the decorations off the boat from the surprise birthday date-night he'd done for me, and set them aside to use in the back yard for his surprise party. A month before the party, I spent a weekend rearranging the entire kitchen counter set-up so that there would be more workspace for the caterers.
I had meetings, phone calls, and emails back and forth with the caterers over the course of 2 months to plan the menu. We had to arrange then rearrange the time to ensure the executive chef would be available at the party. Once the food selections were settled (based on D's favorite dishes, a few things that kids would be sure to like, and side dishes selected from what was fresh for the season) I went to work on the beverages. I spent a few weeks gathering up drink options - cases from Costco of drinks, D's favorite wines and beers from the liquor store - and hid the inventory in G's playhouse in the basement (the only place in the house I could stack things that I was 95% sure D would never bother to look) I picked up a couple of new folding tables and had my MIL hold onto those at her place so that he wouldn't notice them in the garage. I pulled the coolers out of the garage, cleaned them, then put them all back in their original places so as to avoid suspicion.
D's best friend, Steve, offered to be the distraction for the day, and he not only plotted exactly the right kind of distraction (day of mountain biking at a park with enough distance from the house that they had to drive there, giving me a buffer of time when they would call to say they were coming back) but also backed it up with a bike ride the weekend prior, so that the Party Day Ride wouldn't be quite so out-of-the-blue.
In general things came together... but along the way things also threatened to fall apart. Dates were changed to accommodate vacation plans. Phone tag was played when one friend from Portland had last-minute car trouble. I had continual and persistent nightmares... dreams that the caterers forgot to show up, dreams that it poured down rain, dreams that he crashed his bike and didn't make it to the party (the latter of which was not entirely unrealistic) As clusterfucks threatened, I'd beat them each down and press on.
The day of the party I woke early and tried to pretend to not be in a hurry as I showered and dried my hair. D got up and prepped his bike while I meandered around the house, trying to pick things up without looking like I was obviously picking things up. To my great surprise (and relief!) D's friend showed up early, and gave me a whole extra hour to go into Overdrive Mode.
As soon as they left I began shifting things around... I moved our table and chairs out back, cleared off all the extra seating and placed chairs around the yard. I pulled the coolers out of the garage, placed them in the designated area, then went back to try to move the bar. That proved to be a bit too awkward for me to handle, so I left it sit for the time being. I set up (mostly) the guest room, then it was time to race down to the train station to pick up our out of town guest.
Our guest was one of the biggest surprises of the plan... Mike is a friend of D's from high school days, and they marched drum corp. together. Mike now lives in Portland, and we managed to squash the car-trouble issues by arranging for him to take the train so he could be here.
Thankfully, Mike coming early gave me an extra set of hands to help set up. He and I carried all the heavy stuff over from the neighbor's house and moved the bar around to the back. My inlaws soon arrived with my tables and the ice, and I set to work getting the drinks chilled, glasses set out, and bar decorated. The caterers showed a half hour earlier than expected and set right to work prepping the kitchen and setting out the chafing dishes.
Guests were due to start arriving by 4. By some miracle (or maybe it was my OCD level of organization) the back yard was set and ready to go by 3:30.
It was all, absolutely, entirely worth it.
Guests arrived between 4 and 4:20. The ones that drove in hid their cars around the corners or up in the neighbor's driveway. The kids went to work playing in the yard, rolling down the hills, adults gathered on the deck and helped themselves to drinks. Phone calls started up, between Steve and his daughter (a guest at the party) and me and D... I kept racing up the stairs with the house phone so he wouldn't hear the noise of people in the background. They were running late, so the caterers brought out a few snacks for us to munch on, then I put the kids on the job of sitting in G's room - overlooking the driveway - to keep an eye out for when D came home.
Shortly after 5 the kids came screaming down the stairs yelling "THEY'RE HERE! THEY'RE HERE!" while all the adults said "SHHHHH! That's the opposite of SHHHHHHH!" The kids ran up the steps to the grass, then stood with their hands over their mouths to keep themselves quiet.
I wanted the reveal to be big. I didn't want to be in the front yard yelling surprise, I didn't want to even be in the living room... I wanted the point of reveal to be a big giant WHAMMO! for D... smack dab in the middle of the party and the decorations and the people and everything... and I knew he'd figure something was up by the smells that were coming out of the house anyway.
So... for my birthday D had taken me on a surprise date night where he'd blindfolded me and drove me around until I was unable to figure out where we were. I took the same blindfold from our date night and put it on the front doorknob, and had instructed Steve to blindfold D and lead him through the house to the back deck, telling him I had a special dinner planned.
As Steve guided D through the house, the caterers stood absolutely still, hands folded, off to the side.
Then I explained... No, the food is being cooked here.
D stared at me, blinking, still not comprehending.
So I walked him into the kitchen, and introduced him to the executive chef, head of catering, and another chef from Serafina... who were currently hard at work making some of D's favorite dishes of all time.
D is a musician. I've seen him meet other musicians. I've seen him meet very famous, very accomplished, and extremely talented musicians. D walked away from those encounters saying "yeah, that was pretty cool".
When D shook the hand of Dylan the Chef... he was damned near giddy.
The food was, quite frankly, amazing.
Once D had showered up and returned to the party, all my stress and planning and plotting washed away and I sat back and just enjoyed the night. The kids raced around, the adults hung out and ate and visited, music played in the background, the food kept coming.
After the food was all taken care of, while the caterers were packing up... D had a chance to hang out with the chefs and chat about foods for a while. It was fun to watch them talk food stuffs, and D shared some of his infused rum with the guys.
It was a lot of work... a lot of planning and plotting and organizing and circumvention and coordinating... but the look on D's face - when he first saw the surprise, when he saw Mike made it up, when he met the chef - was so incredibly worth it...
...the party was weeks ago, and he still every so often will just randomly say it was the best birthday he's ever had.
5 comments:
looks, sounds awesome.
wondered why no recent posts.
like i said... raising the bar.
yer slick, i tell ya.
:)
Gino - just the other day D was asking what I might want to do for my 40th when it comes around... at this point I'm asking for a week in Yellowstone.
really? a WEEK in yellowstone? one of my goals in life is to go there someday.
Gino - I got the idea from some photographers who have a camp they do every year. If the family didn't want to take a road trip, then I'd want to go on the photography camp as my 40th gift - however D thinks it would be cool to do a road trip through that part of the country that would include some fly fishing (which might end up being longer than a week)
I've been through the park on a day trip driving home from Montana with my parents, I was about 9 I think. I only have vague memories of the park, but even from that I know I could easily spend a month in the park and not get bored of things to shoot.
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